Running Away or Running Toward

Photo by Simon Wijers on Unsplash

So often, we claim to be running toward something -- toward the goal set before us, toward the preferred future that is brighter than our past. 

Arguably, I have said for so long that I am running for the sake of, for the cause of, in the name of Jesus. 

I have worn my relentless pace as a badge of nobility as I labor. 

And yet, I am beginning to wonder about all of this running. Are we actually running toward something? I do indeed hope so! I so desperately hope that we are sacrificing for a greater aim. But I wonder if we are actually running FROM something.  It could be our fear of something, a past that has scarred or jaded us in some way. 

We may actually be masking our fears. 

It's as if I have said more times than not, "I'm busy doing important things. Eternal things. Whatever you need from me right now must take a back seat to whatever I am focused on."  I have neglected and ignored at times the people and things that should be receiving the fullest measure of my attention. 

Cloaked in our sacrificial striving is a frail and self-conscious individual who is actually more afraid than strong. 

We are leaders because we would rather control the narrative and set the agenda than face our own demons. 

But I say, enough. 

Bring the skeletons out of the closet. Face them head-on. 

Become aware of the acute uncomfortability that exists when you cannot sidestep the hard questions by casting more vision. 

We become more like politicians than people the longer we lead large organizations. 

We sidestep the discomfort in the name of clarifying the vision and articulating the mission. 

What would we become if we actually allowed silence to swallow us whole? 

What if we withdrew from being the mouthpiece and listened to some painful answers to questions we should have asked long ago?

What is my dark side? What are my blinds spots? What should I have changed long ago? What is merely tolerated about me that I have the power to change? 

Do yourself, the people you lead, and those closest to you a favor, and ask. 

Then listen. Truly listen to the responses and take them to heart.

If you are the leader you position yourself to be, you will not stop there.

Find ways to take responsibility for what you now know, and make changes. 

Your world will be forever changed as you lead out of vulnerability.